Funny, yet tasteful

Apparently, this year for my work's Christmas party we need to fill in the blanks on a mad-lib type letter to Santa. I guess they are going to be read aloud at the party, or turned into some sort of game. I am not sure if there will be a prize for different categories (funniest, truest, most creative, etc.), or if it will be a guessing game. So, I need your help. I don't want it to be lame, but I am having a hard time being creative, yet work appropriate. I am going to re-type the letter with numbers in the blanks, please comment with your best responses for some or all of the blanks.

Dear Santa,

I have been very ___(1)____ this year! I deserve a big ____(2)_______ and a

_____(3)_____. In addition, a teeny tiny _____(4)______ would also

_____(5) _____ me. The best thing I did this year was ______(6)_____. The

worst thing I did this year was ____(7)_______.

Next year I promise to _____(8)_____ during meetings, do more ___(9)____ at

home, and especially ___(10)____ during my lunch break.

Sincerely,

_____(11)_____

I am looking forward to everyone's suggestions. I want them FUNNY and CREATIVE, but not dirty. I have plenty of really dirty ideas of my own, but I would like to be appropriate for the work place. Actually, leave a comment with whatever you come up with, we will all get a good laugh out of it. I will just add the best, work appropriate ones to my paper. And, maybe, if I am not too lazy I will post the final product.

P.S. This is the work party, by the way, that caused me serious injury last year. Good thing, I got to the sign up list early this year, and only have to bring soda!