FACT: Quinn is scheduled to have surgery next Friday to have a g tube placed in her belly. Her oral feeding and weight gain is still lacking, so we need a more long term solution. It is considered an outpatient surgery with an overnight stay.
OPINION: My feelings are mixed. Everything I have read and heard that are after an NG tube (her feeding tube in her nose), a g tube is a walk in the park. However, I am not convinced yet. Also, I have some PTSD type issues about admitting Quinn into the hospital, and getting "stuck." Now, that we have Quinn home, I want to keep her here, and not risk it for anything. Also, the surgery "should" help with her feeding, and "should" help with her weight gain, but not guarantees. I would feel better if I knew for sure this was a going to make things better. The whole thing stresses me out.
FACT: Dalan is still feeling yucky. He had an ultrasound two weeks ago, and they did not see gallstones, however, his doctor is not ruling a problem with his gallbladder out yet, and he goes in for more testing at the end of the month.
OPINION: I feel bad for him. Who wants to feel sick all the time? The thought of Quinn having surgery, and then Dalan having surgery is a bit overwhelming.
FACT: I have not really done anything fun or left the house for anything other than the hospital, errands, and work in over ten months, with a handful of exceptions. (Two plays and a few family get togethers.)
OPINION: It sucks. I have gone stir crazy. I can't wait for the end of the cold and flu season, and getting to rejoin the living again. I am grateful Quinn has stayed so healthy although, so it does make it worth it. I am just ready for it to end.
FACT: My house is a disgusting mess.
OPINION: I am tired all the time. I get off work, eat dinner, play with Quinn, put Quinn to bed, wash bottles and dishes, get bottles ready for the next day, straighten up, shower, and I am done. I have no energy to keep up with anything beyond very basic housecleaning. My house is now driving me crazy, and adding to my feelings of being overwhelmed.
6 comments:
I'm so sorry -- it would be VERY overwhelming! I'm sorry Quinn needs surgery, but at our house you have all our hoping, wishing and praying that this is the answer for Quinn!
And sick husbands -- I feel bad for Dalan, but just as bad for you. It's so stressful for everyone! Being sick is bad -- not really knowing what the problem is just makes it worse!
I cannot wait for Spring so you can get out more, than Summer so you can have all the time in the day you want to play and clean and do everything you want to at your leisure!
Thinking of you guys! I hope the stress dies down soon!
Sorry Jesse.
Stress Sucks.
If you need any help with anything, let us know! Seriously.
Fact You are an amazing mom and Quinn is a very lucky little one to have such informed and loving parents who look into all options before doing anything.
Opinion (hoping to be fact) things will happen and change before you know it and you will be going out as a family to do fun and crazy things sooner than you expect.
Fact Nathan and I will come and hang if you and Dal want some time
Fact Quinn is so stinkin cute that I might kiss her all over when we watch her.
Fact We Love You Guys!!!
I'm sorry things are stressful. We've had many discussions over lunch about these things, but I too think you have done everything in your power to make a good, informed choice. So many people just take the doc's word for everything, but you do your own research and ask a lot of questions. Quinn could not ask for a better mom, seriously.
Also, was fact/opinion inspired by your recent lesson at school? Fact and Opinion? hehe :) It was nice to enjoy sushi with you today.
I'm very sorry that you have to go through this. Surgery isn't fun but someone wise reminded me when I was in a similar position that the whole experience will be so much harder for you than her. She doesn't have the worry ahead of time and it'll be over before she knows it even happened. With that being said I understand how hard it all is for you. You'll be in my thoughts and if you need to talk feel free to bend my ear. I'm a good listener. If it makes you feel better my house is a disaster too! I Have absolutely no excuse. Besides just not making the time to do it. This kind of stuff will make you an even stronger mother, as if you aren't already after the lengthy hospital stay. Hang in there. This time next week you'll feel a MILLION times better!!!!
I was just telling Rob tonight "I've got to be doing something wrong because being a mom couldn't possibly be this hard."
We'll be thinking about y'all and praying for Quinn. Hopefully this will all be behind you soon.
Can't wait to meet that sweet, sweet girl in just a couple of weeks!!!!
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