People love to remind me Quinn almost/could have died. Weird, right? At least half of the conversations I have with casual acquaintances/co-workers about Quinn lead to this subject. I would think it would poor manners to remind a mother that her baby was so sick, but people love to bring it up. I get it- she has an amazing story. She is amazing, but do I really need to be reminded daily that my baby could have died, and that I am so lucky she didn't? I was there after all, in the trenches, dealing with a failing pregnancy and then a super tiny, micro-preemie.
Most conversations with these type of people go one of three ways.
Scenario 1:
Person: How is your baby doing?
Me: Really well.
Person: That is amazing. You are so lucky/blessed.
Me: Yes, we are very lucky.
Person (whispering): You know a lot of babies her size don't make it/ You are lucky she is even here.
Scenario 2:
Person: How is your baby doing?
Me: Ok, she is still struggling to eat.
Person: Well, you should feel blessed that you even have her/It is amazing she is even alive.
Me: Yes, I know.
Scenario 3:
Person: How is your baby doing?
Me: Really well.
Person: (stares at me)
Me: She is hitting all her developmental milestones.
Person: (just continues to stare at me until I say something like....)
Me: We are very lucky that things turned out so well.
*This is not meant to offend. I really do love everyone's support! It is just a weird conversation to have with people I barely/casually know over and over again. Most of the time, I have this same conversation with the same person multiple times.
Plus, I am exhausted. Quinn's alarm is killing me, as is being back at work after a nice, long winter's break. Hopefully, happy and optimistic Jessi will be back before we know it.
3 comments:
That would be awkward. I mean, I get people being in awe of Quinn and her story, but frequent reminders of the hardest thing you've ever gone through probably sucks.
I hope the whole alarm thing isn't an issue for much longer -- that whole situation just sounds torturous.
I'm sorry. I can't say that I know how that feels. But I can empathize with people telling you to be grateful even when things still feel hard. Like you aren't entitled to feel bad or frustrated, only always grateful. Well that's sort of a given isn't it? I hope that your eating issues resolve themselves soon, as well as the oxygen alarm issues. Being tired doesn't put anyone in the best frame of mind, especially being tired day after day. I'm sending good vibes your way!
I bet you get soooo tired of that. Maybe you need to get a tattoo on your forhead that just says "lucky." hehe. JK, but really, people just have bad social skills. I hate that you have to be the brunt of that though!
Damn that alarm. The worst part is, it's not even a baby waking you up, it's a machine! I bet that's super frustrating.
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